Twelve Days Of Christmas Lyrics
Bob & Doug Mckenzie
Lyrics
And you can play this at your Christmas parties, uh
Or to yourself on Christmas Eve, if there's nothin' else to do
Good day, eh?
Yeah
In case you thought, like, I wasn't on this part
Oh, I guarantee ya you'd be on
OK, so good day, this is the Christmas part
And we're gonna tell ya what to get, uh
Your true love for Christmas
Look out the window!
Where? What are ya doin'?
Snow, hosehead
What?
Oh, it's the Great White North, and it's snowing
'Cause it's Christmastime
Hey, hoser
What?
Here's a quiz
Quiz for Doug
OK, I have my thinking toque on
Yeah, right
What are the twelve days of Christmas?
'Cause (um) figure it out, right?
Christmas is when?
Uh, the twenty-fifth
Right, and what's the twenty-fourth?
Christmas Eve, right? So that's two (that's two)
And, then what's after that?
Uh (Boxing Day) Wrestling Day
No, get out
Boxing Day, yeah, yeah
That's three
I knew it was…
Then, what's after that? Nothin'
New Year's
Four, and what's be...
New Year's Eve?
Five. Where do ya get twelve?
Uh, there's two Saturdays and Sundays in there, that's four
That's nine
And three other days which, I believe, are the mystery days
Oh, OK, now, this our Christmas song
In case you don't know what to get Somebody for Christmas
There's lots of ideas in here, so listen and don't get stuck
OK
By the way, that's me on the organ
Oh, geez
You start
OK
On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me
A beer
On the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me
Two turtlenecks
And a beer
OK, good
On the third day of Christmas, my true love gave to me
Three French toasts
Two turtlenecks
And a beer, OK
That should be more there, eh?
Where? On the… go
Fourth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me
Four pounds of back bacon
Three French toasts
Two turtlenecks
And a beer
In a tree
See, you need more (oh, yeah)
Fifth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me
Five golden toques
Four pounds of back bacon
Three French toasts
Two turtlenecks
And a beer … what was that?
In a tree (a tree)
OK, on the sixth d… go!
Christmas, my true love gave to me
(Six) Six packs of two-four
(Five golden toques) five golden toques, beauty
(Four) four pounds of back bacon
(Three) three French toasts
(Two) two turtlenecks
(And a beer) and a beer in a tree
OK (OK)
On the seventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me
Seven pack of smokes
(Nice gift)
Nice gift
Oh, six packs of two-four
(Five golden toques) five golden toques
(Four) four pounds of back bacon
(Three) three French toasts
(Two) two turtlenecks
(And a beer) and a beer in a tree
Right, I keep forgetting
Whew! (OK) This should just be the "Two Days of Christmas"
It's too hard for us
Um
Go, hoser
Oh
On the eighth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me
Eight comic books
(Eight comic books) seven packs of smokes
(Seven packs of smokes) six packs of two-four
(Six packs of two-four) five...
(Five golden toques)
(Four pounds of back bacon)
(Three French toasts)
(Two turtlenecks)
(And a beer) And a beer
On my knee
Yeah, and that beer is empty
OK, day (twelve) uh
Twelve
Good day, and welcome to day twelve
Yeah
(Five golden toques) golden toques
(Four pounds of back bacon) four pounds of back bacon
(Three) three French toasts
(Two) two turtlenecks
(And a beer in a tree) and a beer in a tree
Beauty, eh?
Where'd you learn to do that?
Boy
So, like, that's our song
Merry Christmas
Merry Christmas
And good day!
Good day, everybody
Hap… happy New Year, too
OK, you know what you left out?
What?
Doughnuts
Oh, no
I told you to get me doughnuts
Either on the ninth day, or the tenth day, or the eleventh day
OK, the song's over
I wanted doughnuts
But I want… (merry Christmas, everybody)
Or, on the twelfth day (so) you could've gotten me a dozen doughnuts
Go out to the stores (you could've gone down, to)
And get some presents
Like, the good doughnut shop where if you buy a dozen
You get another one free
And that would've been thirteen
For the "Thirteen Days of Christmas"
Well, next Christmas, get me a chainsaw
Take off
Boy, that song was a beauty
It... it moved me
Yeah, I think it ranks up there with "Stairway to Heaven"
What?
Song & Lyrics Facts
Bob & Doug McKenzie's classic version of the "Twelve Days of Christmas" was released in 1981 on their debut album, The Great White North. Written by Rick Moranis and Dave Thomas (who also portrayed Bob and Doug), the song features a unique take on the traditional holiday tune with Canadian references such as "two turtlenecks", "eleven hosers hollering" and "eight beavers a-swimming".
Musically, it is performed in a country style with acoustic guitar, banjo, fiddle and mandolin accompaniment. Lyrically, the song follows the original melody but contains some new verses that are specific to the McKenzie brothers' interpretation. In addition, there are several humorous ad libs added throughout the performance.